Birds, I warned you...

Long time readers of this blog will remember what happened to the starlings that decided to break into our home.  For those of you who are new, allow me to point out this post, filled with a variety of ways to kill birds.

This spring Travis has decided that birds that get inside are not the only ones that need to die.    If it nests on our house, and poops all over our sidewalks, porches and railings... well it's put itself on the hit list. 

My dear husband has kept this bb gun by the back door so that he can shoot to kill any time he sees fit.  In a very redneck move, he actually shot at one bird through the living room window screen.  What can I say, we've got class.

So far he has killed 7 birds, 4 of them being barely-feathered baby birds sitting in the nest, awaiting their mother. 

Where is his heart, you may ask yourself?  Well, I'm pretty sure the part of his heart reserved for birds died the day he had to clean up massive amounts of apple bird poop all over our house.

9 little birds

So far we've had 9 birds get into our house. We're not exactly sure how they get in, but they do. A couple of weeks ago I came home to a bird flying between the kitchen window and the dining room window. The bird had eaten all our apples and then puked them all up and had pooped all over. The bird had also been upstairs in the apartment where my cousin is currently living and had pooped all over there, too.


To put it in Travis' words, "After that, I vowed no bird would leave our house alive again."


And he's been true to his word.


The next bird Travis caught with his bare hands, took to the garage, but in a plastic bag and then chopped it in half with his axe.


The next bird Travis smacked with a broom, leaving it alive but knocked out. That bird was taken to the garage and beheaded.


The last bird was whacked by the broom and died on impact.


My advice to the bird community is stay away from our house!